3AM and I am still awake

What am I still doing up anyway? Beats me, I just can't sleep so I decided to blog if that even helps. As you know, inspiration strikes me in the most indecent hours so maybe I can get something out of this. Maybe I can't sleep because I had an afternoon nap. Yeah, that would be it.

I'm also waiting for The Breakfast Club to finish downloading. Only 30 more minutes! :)) I shall watch it right after it has finished downloading. Maybe it will help me sleep. Or should I sleep now before my sister wakes up for school? Hmm. Decisions, decisions. But only 20 minutes left! I should wait for it already. hihihi.

I have been thinking why I have such an unproductive life. Hahaha. That sounds funny and conceited but yeah. I wish to be more out there-more social, more interesting, more PRODUCTIVE. But seriously, school is draining the life out of me. It's the truth!

So since this semester is soooo stressful (or toxic, as many of UP students would understand that better), I promise that next semester I will put myself out there and I will have more social activities and more extracurricular activities that I will still take time to think about.

By next sem, I should be able to write again and submit essays and articles somewhere to be published (yes, I can be quite ambitious) and I should be able to learn and master playing the drums. So my fingers are crossed and I am quite hopeful that I shall be productive (in areas other that academics) and that laziness won't take over me.

Oh, and I will start a literary thing again. Hihihi. I tried that once, but I failed finishing it. I will write short stories everyday for a year or whatnot but you get the point. Just short stories. But they should be nice short stories! Hahaha. Last time I tried, I only got to finish 16 stories. Two weeks. lol. That was a fail, obviously. I'll post some here, is that okay? :))

October 13, 2010

It has been gray for a while now- rainy, dull and empty. Nothing’s going to change; tomorrow’s another gray day. Maybe it’s better to feel sad than this empty. At least, there is some form of inexplicable beauty in sadness. But empty, empty is nothing-it is just nothing.

October 15, 2010

Bittersweet moments are almost always just bitter. Most of the time, we are all just afraid to let go of everything and so we make up little sweet moments that is of the slightest significance for us to hold on to.

That’s the truth- there are no bittersweet moments. Only bitterness with deliciously sugarcoated lies.

October 19, 2010

We’re young: we’re licensed to have fun-bend and break the rules. Drink all the alcohol you can, dance to all the songs your feet can take, party from night till dawn, fall in love as much as your heart desires and take as many pictures of these moments. Have fun while you still can.

We’re only young now and this too shall pass. The world won’t wait, darling.

October 27, 2010

It was barely a start and now it’s good-bye. Too sudden, too quick, too unexpected. Yesterday was an explosion of happiness; today-two broken hearts. All we have left are vague memories of glances with obscure meanings and smiles that made hearts beat faster. Fate cut us off before words were even spoken, before fingers even touched and before lips even met.

There wasn’t even time or space of a propergood-bye. Suddenly, you were just…gone.

November 12, 2010

People seem to think that tears can wash away our pain. We seem to think that it can take our sadness and our worries away with it. But, it doesn’t does it? It leaves an empty space at the pit of your stomach and a sinking feeling in your heart. The truth is that the moment you let yourself cry, you lose control of yourself. The moment you let yourself cry, you become entirely and irreversibly vulnerable.

Crying is not some form of release. It just fucks everything up and leaves you wallowing in self pity. No, crying doesn’t make you feel better. It makes you feel a lot worse.

November 17, 2010

You’re near enough to taste but way too far to reach. We’re always almost there but not quite. But almost is nothing but almost. You’re not mine and I’m not yours because we’re nothing but an almost. There’s nothing to hold on to and nothing to lose because what are we, but almosts? Time starts to rush in and you start to lose me and I start to lose you. But wait, how can that be?

You were never mine and I was never yours to lose.

See, those were my best works at that time :)) Not even close to great. I KNOW I CAN DO BETTER! Because there was a time I did better than any of those works. And I can do it again, even exceed it! Lezz do this :>